readers,
if my blog were an e-mail this is how it would look
i don’t capitalize or use punctuation
i simply start a new line for each new thought
i adopted this style to deal with 100+ e-mails each day
when writing a formal memo i capitalize and use punctuation
but 95 percent of my e-mail responses are in this style
my wife hates it and feels it is unprofessional
no one else has every complained
let me know what you think
ralph t
p.s.
i always sign "ralph t"
she doesn't understand that either
i worked with a ralph h for about 10 years and adopted the moniker
ralph h left about five years ago, but i continue
i've asked my wife to sign "mary t" so i know who she is
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
Monday, March 15, 2010
Don't call me "sir"!
Add “dude” to the list of things I don’t like to be called, right behind “sir” and “mister.”
The first time I noticed, I was in the locker room at the YMCA. Two men in their 20s came in and were planning on swimming. They couldn’t complete a sentence without using "dude" or "bro." They were nice, asking me about the YM and the pool. They were in the locker room again after my workout and we resumed talking. On my way out, one of them held up what looked like a nice ripe banana. “Do you want a banana dude,”? he asked. “They are good for you after you work out.”
I declined and walked out. For some reason, I didn’t like him calling me “dude.” A few days later a co-worker in his 20s called me “dude” after I asked him about an upcoming assignment. Again, it bothered me.
I’ve always hated sir and mister because they are too formal for me. As far as I’m concerned, everyone from 2 to 92 can call me "Ralph." In fact, I would prefer it.
I used to like when people called me “dude” because it is something young people say to each other. I hope this mood passes.
Let me know what you think.
The first time I noticed, I was in the locker room at the YMCA. Two men in their 20s came in and were planning on swimming. They couldn’t complete a sentence without using "dude" or "bro." They were nice, asking me about the YM and the pool. They were in the locker room again after my workout and we resumed talking. On my way out, one of them held up what looked like a nice ripe banana. “Do you want a banana dude,”? he asked. “They are good for you after you work out.”
I declined and walked out. For some reason, I didn’t like him calling me “dude.” A few days later a co-worker in his 20s called me “dude” after I asked him about an upcoming assignment. Again, it bothered me.
I’ve always hated sir and mister because they are too formal for me. As far as I’m concerned, everyone from 2 to 92 can call me "Ralph." In fact, I would prefer it.
I used to like when people called me “dude” because it is something young people say to each other. I hope this mood passes.
Let me know what you think.
Monday, February 22, 2010
I miss the movie theater
As I navigated through the movie theater parking lot on a recent night, a group of middle school-age kids darted in front of my SUV. Two girls were chasing two boys and when they got to the theater door the boys began playfully blocking the door. When an older couple needed to enter, they stepped aside. When the girls tried to sneak in behind the couple, the boys quickly blocked them.
I was not dropping my children off at the Wallingford movie theater, just cutting through to Route 5. My wife tells me it among the longest of my infamous shortcuts and I use it only when she is not in the car because she freaks out. (When I first arrived in town almost 25 years ago there was no movie theater and the plaza was pretty empty so it made a convenient cut over from North Main Street Extension to Route 5. But I digress. If you would like me to write a separate blog on my not-so short shortcuts, let me know.)
Recently, a colleague was asking me about whether she should let her sixth grader go to the movies on his own. I told her I thought it was OK and offered some tips. My last words were: “The real trouble starts when they don’t want to go to the movies anymore.”
When they were in middle school, it seemed my sons were at the movie theater nearly every weekend, sometimes both nights. My sons, about to be 15 and 17, still occasionally go. The last time my oldest went he drove. When they were in middle school, it was cool to skip dances and go to the movies. Apparently dances are more closely supervised than the movie theater. But about halfway through their freshman year both stopped going regularly because going to the movies was no longer cool. Now they prefer to hang out at friend’s houses in the cold weather and almost anywhere during the nice weather, including our pool.
I can’t believe I used to complain about having to pick them up at the movies. Hanging out is much more stressful on parents.
Let me know what you think.
I was not dropping my children off at the Wallingford movie theater, just cutting through to Route 5. My wife tells me it among the longest of my infamous shortcuts and I use it only when she is not in the car because she freaks out. (When I first arrived in town almost 25 years ago there was no movie theater and the plaza was pretty empty so it made a convenient cut over from North Main Street Extension to Route 5. But I digress. If you would like me to write a separate blog on my not-so short shortcuts, let me know.)
Recently, a colleague was asking me about whether she should let her sixth grader go to the movies on his own. I told her I thought it was OK and offered some tips. My last words were: “The real trouble starts when they don’t want to go to the movies anymore.”
When they were in middle school, it seemed my sons were at the movie theater nearly every weekend, sometimes both nights. My sons, about to be 15 and 17, still occasionally go. The last time my oldest went he drove. When they were in middle school, it was cool to skip dances and go to the movies. Apparently dances are more closely supervised than the movie theater. But about halfway through their freshman year both stopped going regularly because going to the movies was no longer cool. Now they prefer to hang out at friend’s houses in the cold weather and almost anywhere during the nice weather, including our pool.
I can’t believe I used to complain about having to pick them up at the movies. Hanging out is much more stressful on parents.
Let me know what you think.
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Becoming an X-File ?
I never watched the X-Files when it originally aired. In 2008, my wife and I saw the most recent X-Files movie at the theater and I left hooked. For the next three months or so I watched nothing but X-Files, making it through seven of the nine seasons. Why did I stop? Burnout. Watching one show exclusively for three months is not the same as watching it over nine years.
About three weeks ago I was re-arranging my DVDs and looked at my X-Files collection. Something clicked and I started watching it again. I’m up to season three. This is not the first time I’ve been compulsive about a particular show or channel. About 10 years ago I spent an entire winter watching the Golf Channel. I like golf. But part of the appeal was watching them play in places like Dubai, Australia and Hawaii, which are sunny and warm while we suffer through winter. For much of 2002 and 2003 I watched nothing but C-Span. When the NFL network first aired, I watched it non-stop for about three months. Last year I borrowed nearly every DVD from the public library that that interested me and didn’t bother with cable (except Yankee games) for the better part of six months. Prior to my X-Files fixation, I was on a college basketball binge.
On a related note, I also sometimes watch movies repeatedly. Some I’ve watched 25 times or more include Citizen Cane, Casablanca, My Cousin Vinny, The Queen (I’ve probably watched it 100 times), A Few Good Men (also about 100 times), Fog of War, Las Vegas Vacation, The DaVinci Code and The Burbs.
My family thinks this is all very strange, especially my temporary obsession with C-Span and The Queen.
Let me know what you think.
About three weeks ago I was re-arranging my DVDs and looked at my X-Files collection. Something clicked and I started watching it again. I’m up to season three. This is not the first time I’ve been compulsive about a particular show or channel. About 10 years ago I spent an entire winter watching the Golf Channel. I like golf. But part of the appeal was watching them play in places like Dubai, Australia and Hawaii, which are sunny and warm while we suffer through winter. For much of 2002 and 2003 I watched nothing but C-Span. When the NFL network first aired, I watched it non-stop for about three months. Last year I borrowed nearly every DVD from the public library that that interested me and didn’t bother with cable (except Yankee games) for the better part of six months. Prior to my X-Files fixation, I was on a college basketball binge.
On a related note, I also sometimes watch movies repeatedly. Some I’ve watched 25 times or more include Citizen Cane, Casablanca, My Cousin Vinny, The Queen (I’ve probably watched it 100 times), A Few Good Men (also about 100 times), Fog of War, Las Vegas Vacation, The DaVinci Code and The Burbs.
My family thinks this is all very strange, especially my temporary obsession with C-Span and The Queen.
Let me know what you think.
Monday, February 8, 2010
I swear I'm sorry
I’ve noticed that most of the time I let a profanity slip out, which isn’t very often, I almost always immediately apologize. I do this even if the slip occurs in my office with only one other person present. I’ve noticed people doing the same with me. The latest example was at a gathering of basketball parents at a local bar Friday night. The parent I was talking to used the f word in a very casual and quiet way. It wasn’t vulgar or loud and I didn’t think much of it until she apologized. To be honest, the apology made me feel more awkward than the profanity. Does she think I would think less of her for such a minor slip up? Do the people I apologize to feel the same way?
Later in the night a few other parents were talking about a town in Connecticut that has started fining students if they use profanity. That started a conversation about how people in general, including teen-agers, seem to swear less than in previous generations. We all agreed that when we started our careers swearing in the work place was prevalent and today it is a rarity.
A few minutes later a patron with fewer inhibitions dropped a very loud f-bomb because she was unhappy they had turned the music down. She didn't apologize or seem the least bit embarassed. In fact, a few minutes later she did the same thing. I kind of admired her ability to let loose. After all, were were all in a bar around midnight on Friday. Shouldn't people feel relaxed enough to use a little profanity?
Just today I screwed up my daily video about halfway through and let out a very angry swear in front of a longtime male colleague who has heard the word more than a few times. It was an impulse-swear, done out of frustration because until that point the video was flowing well. I apologized to him three times before he left the office. Not sure why.
Let me know what you think
Later in the night a few other parents were talking about a town in Connecticut that has started fining students if they use profanity. That started a conversation about how people in general, including teen-agers, seem to swear less than in previous generations. We all agreed that when we started our careers swearing in the work place was prevalent and today it is a rarity.
A few minutes later a patron with fewer inhibitions dropped a very loud f-bomb because she was unhappy they had turned the music down. She didn't apologize or seem the least bit embarassed. In fact, a few minutes later she did the same thing. I kind of admired her ability to let loose. After all, were were all in a bar around midnight on Friday. Shouldn't people feel relaxed enough to use a little profanity?
Just today I screwed up my daily video about halfway through and let out a very angry swear in front of a longtime male colleague who has heard the word more than a few times. It was an impulse-swear, done out of frustration because until that point the video was flowing well. I apologized to him three times before he left the office. Not sure why.
Let me know what you think
Friday, January 29, 2010
Pathetic Blog
Watchers of my daily video may have noticed my hair is much shorter. Regular readers of the blog may recall getting a haircut is one of my least favorite things to do. My barber, Gerardo, is the best. I just like my hair long. It was some fellow 40-something friends that prompted me to return to Gerardo’s chair.
“Ralph, you know you have really full hair for someone your age,” one friend said as he labored on the ellip-tical machine at the YMCA. “And almost no gray.”
A couple of days later another 40-something guy at the Y said almost the same thing. Suspecting it was some kind of prank orchestrated by my wife, who is jealous that I have almost no gray, my eyes scanned the room to see if she was watching. She wasn’t even there.
On Saturday Mary and I attended a benefit dance. Shortly before 11 p.m. the lights were turned down and we were standing side by side near the back of the hall watching the dance floor. Suddenly someone’s fingers were running through my hair. Since Mary was slightly in front of me, I deduced they were not her fingers. Spinning around, I was face to face with another middle-aged man who complimented me on my hair and asked if I could spare some for his bald head. I didn’t need a breathalyzer to know he had had a few drinks.
“Sure,” I said. “When I get it cut, I’ll save some for you.”
Gerardo is closed on Sunday. My schedule was full on Monday. Tuesday was a day off. First thing on the list was a trip to Gerardo’s.
My wife will probably view this blog as a pathetic attempt to highlight my lack of gray. But it’s really about karma. Middle aged men aren’t the target audience I had in mind. Two compliments and one feel in less than a week seemed to be an omen.
It also made me think that at 46 perhaps I’m too old wear my hair long.
Let me know what you think.
(It is Ok to agree with my wife. In fact, it would probably help me at home if people would treat me a little harsher on this blog.)
“Ralph, you know you have really full hair for someone your age,” one friend said as he labored on the ellip-tical machine at the YMCA. “And almost no gray.”
A couple of days later another 40-something guy at the Y said almost the same thing. Suspecting it was some kind of prank orchestrated by my wife, who is jealous that I have almost no gray, my eyes scanned the room to see if she was watching. She wasn’t even there.
On Saturday Mary and I attended a benefit dance. Shortly before 11 p.m. the lights were turned down and we were standing side by side near the back of the hall watching the dance floor. Suddenly someone’s fingers were running through my hair. Since Mary was slightly in front of me, I deduced they were not her fingers. Spinning around, I was face to face with another middle-aged man who complimented me on my hair and asked if I could spare some for his bald head. I didn’t need a breathalyzer to know he had had a few drinks.
“Sure,” I said. “When I get it cut, I’ll save some for you.”
Gerardo is closed on Sunday. My schedule was full on Monday. Tuesday was a day off. First thing on the list was a trip to Gerardo’s.
My wife will probably view this blog as a pathetic attempt to highlight my lack of gray. But it’s really about karma. Middle aged men aren’t the target audience I had in mind. Two compliments and one feel in less than a week seemed to be an omen.
It also made me think that at 46 perhaps I’m too old wear my hair long.
Let me know what you think.
(It is Ok to agree with my wife. In fact, it would probably help me at home if people would treat me a little harsher on this blog.)
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
A nice suprise
Based on conversations and other anecdotal evidence, my assumption is most Americans feel we spend too much on “foreign aid.” It seems the recession has only deepened the feeling that we need to take care of “our own” before we send more money overseas. This is why the crowd at a recent high school basketball game caught my attention.
The game was being played at Amity Regional High School a couple of weeks ago. Most high schools don’t charge those who show up early for the freshman and JV games. About halfway through the JV game the fans in the stands noticed a table was being set up outside the main entrance to collect admission. Many started discussing whether they would voluntarily go over to the table and pay the admission price. Most decided that the Amity school system was not hurting for funding and could get by without their contribution. It also spurred a lot of discussions about school budgets in general. Many felt they could not afford to pay one dime more for education.
About the same time, about a half dozen students started canvassing the growing crowd for contributions. I can’t recall what school club they were collecting for, but no one in my vicinity contributed. As I looked over to other sections, I saw almost no one was responding.
As the varsity game was about to start the crowd grew to almost 200. A young woman came to our section and announced the Key Club was collecting to help earthquake victims in Haiti. Everyone stood in unison, reaching for their wallets and purses. No one complained at all. The half dozen students left the gym, each with a coffee can stuffed with bills.
Let me know what you think.
The game was being played at Amity Regional High School a couple of weeks ago. Most high schools don’t charge those who show up early for the freshman and JV games. About halfway through the JV game the fans in the stands noticed a table was being set up outside the main entrance to collect admission. Many started discussing whether they would voluntarily go over to the table and pay the admission price. Most decided that the Amity school system was not hurting for funding and could get by without their contribution. It also spurred a lot of discussions about school budgets in general. Many felt they could not afford to pay one dime more for education.
About the same time, about a half dozen students started canvassing the growing crowd for contributions. I can’t recall what school club they were collecting for, but no one in my vicinity contributed. As I looked over to other sections, I saw almost no one was responding.
As the varsity game was about to start the crowd grew to almost 200. A young woman came to our section and announced the Key Club was collecting to help earthquake victims in Haiti. Everyone stood in unison, reaching for their wallets and purses. No one complained at all. The half dozen students left the gym, each with a coffee can stuffed with bills.
Let me know what you think.
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