Self Improvement setback?

I recently finished an audio book on time management. The premise is that many of us spend too much time on things that are not aligned with what we consider most important. This causes stress and the stress and its results further blind us from what is most important, creating a self-perpetuating decline in quality of life.
The thing that is most important to me is my wife and two sons. So I’ve been trying extra hard lately to make sure that no matter what else is going on I put them first more often. Recently I messed up. I’ll share the story with the hope it might help you avoid the same.

I was off from work on a weekday and had spent the day and early evening doing yard work and watching my youngest son Danny, 14, play baseball. Early in the afternoon I also spent some time prodding my oldest son Michael, 16, to start his homework. He had a history paper to write on the leadership styles of Martin Luther King Jr. and Malcom X. For the past week or so he has been asking me a lot of questions about the two leaders. At my suggestion, he watched the Spike Lee film “Malcom X.” I was impressed by his willingness to put in extra time on the project. But at 6:30 p.m. my main concern was that he was just getting started on a paper due the next day. Like a lot of teens, Michael procrastinates and that creates problems because he often needs help after 9 p.m. and by that time my wife and are often worn down. When I looked to see how he was doing, he started telling me he was impressed with some of MLK’s quotes and read a couple to me. He also asked me whose leadership style I thought was more effective. That triggered a short discussion about the connection between MLK and Ghandi. I suggested he watch the movie "Ghandi." I should have been impressed by Michael’s interest in the assignment. Instead I was more worried about him finishing too late. I also had this sudden compulsion to cut the lawn and stop at the R-J to see what had landed on my desk after a four-day vacation.
“Dad. You’ll read my paper later on?,” Michael asked.
He knows history and writing were my best subjects so he often asks me to read his history papers for any factual mistakes or awkward sentences.
“Sure Michael. I won’t be back from the Record-Journal until after you are asleep. But I’ll give it a read and leave you a note if I see anything that needs to be fixed. You can do it in the morning.”
He thanked me and I started cutting the lawn. I also decided to clean off the pool cover. Less than an hour’s worth of work became more than two hours. By the time I got to the R-J it was close to 9. By the time I left it was close to 11. By the time I fixed my lunch for the next day, set up the coffee maker and straightened up a few things it was nearly midnight.
At around 7 a.m. my eyes shot open: “I forgot to read his paper.” I checked the alarm clock and realized he had already left.
It seems like a small thing but forgetting to read his paper did add stress to the first half of my day, proof that if you don’t align your time and your values it causes problems. My mistake was putting the lawn, pool cover and work on my desk that could have waited ahead of the one request my son made of me in 24 hours. The other lesson for those of you raising teens now or in the future is that you can’t let the stuff that drives you crazy obscure what is really important. In this case, I focused on procrastination and missed the fact that Michael is extremely interested in history.

If you are interested in the book it is titled “Manage Your Time To Reduce Your Stress: A Handbook for the Overworked, Overscheduled and Overwhelmed” by Rita Emmett.
If you know me and worry the title signals I’m having serious problems, relax. I enjoy audio books and self improvement. I’m not overworked or overwhelmed, but would like to avoid both.
The most important thing I learned from the book is really simple. Just list the four or five most important things in your life. It helps if you think of it in terms of the people, activities and things you would miss most if they were gone. Once you have the list, you compare it to your daily and weekly schedule and make sure you are leaving enough time for the things that are most important. Each day you also have to give yourself a reward. My reward today will be to read for pleasure for at least one hour.

As always, let me know what you think.